I love chatting with other girls who love football, but I also understand that some folks who are not into football are forced to watch the Super Bowl. (For instance, when I was a kid, the halftime show was the only thing I enjoyed. Dancing children in multicultural costumes! Random singing people! Audience members with color-coded cards that form stadium-size pictures!)
So for those of you who are going to watch whether you want to or not, please trust me when I say that you will have much more fun watching if you pick a side to support. And I am here to help.
First of all, the two teams playing are the Indianapolis Colts and the New Orleans Saints.
Now, let’s put these teams into perspective, Gossip Girl Style.
In the world of Serena vs. Blair, the Colts are Serena and the Saints are Blair.
Let me ‘splain:
The hair! So pretty!
Indianapolis Colts, aka Serena: The Colts are good. They have been good for years. They will be good for years to come. That’s because they have an amazing QB in Peyton Manning. Manning is, in fact, one of the best QBs of all time. Like, top 5 easily. The rest of the team has had its ups and downs, but as long as Peyton is around, they have always been able to pull it together. Never the underdog, always lauded by the media, they lead sort of a charmed existence, but somehow still manage to be likable.
Just like Serena, who gets whatever she wants, whom every boy loves, no matter how weird or stupid her actions are. And yet, you can’t really hate Serena. Mostly, I think, because she has awesome hair. Which doesn’t really apply, but it’s just the truth.
Chuck + Blair = Awesome
New Orleans Saints, aka Blair: The Saints, on the other hand, have been perpetual losers in their NFL life. This will be the team’s first ever trip to the Super Bowl. And though their QB, Drew Brees, is also amazing at what he does, he flies way under the radar compared to Manning and his 20 bazillion commercials (he’s the one on those American Express ads). The Saints are having a charmed run this NFL season, but they’ve been through a lot–not just the fact that they are city representatives for post-Katrina New Orleans, but even in football terms, the team has been championship caliber for years, but always fell apart due to injuries, poor coaching, etc. This is their time to shine, and suddenly they are becoming the most likable team around.
Just like Blair was the underdog all along–sure she had all the advantages, but no matter what she did she always fell short in the eyes of boys (Nate loved Serena more), her mom (who loved Serena more), and everyone else (her school, the media, etc.). But then she started dating Chuck, and the show became hers. No arguing it, right? She has the TV season in the palm of her hands with awesomeness. Granted, she is also way privileged and super-bitchy, which isn’t Saints-like at all, but it’s all about context.
So who would you rather support: Serena’s Colts or Blair’s Saints?
When I was in high school (and still didn’t like football), my English teacher Mr. Fenlon told us that if we guessed the combined Super Bowl score for that weekend’s game we would receive a 100% on our weekly vocab quiz. Which, in hindsight, was not a very big deal. But I thought it was so completely awesome.
