Tag Archives: New England Patriots

Super Bowl Bingo: NY Giants vs. NE Patriots

5 Feb

Ok, I’ll admit it. I’ve let this blog get away from me.

No excuses. Except I moved out of the country. Does that count? No?

Anyway, even from all the way in Europe, I’ve come up with my annual easy and fun Super Bowl bingo game. Ideally, Super Bowl Bingo will help keep football fans invested in case of a blowout, and it will make the game more interesting for those who are in it for the commercials.

Super Bowl Bingo

2 Players (or two teams of 2)
Materials: Super Bowl Bingo game Cards (1 per player); M&Ms, pennies, or just a pen/highlighter

Directions:
1. Download the Super Bowl Bingo cards.
2. Print and cut out a game card for each player/team.
3. Fill in the Bonus square with something you think you will see during the game.
4. Readvover the squares with any non-football fans before the game starts.
5. Watch the Super Bowl. Each time an item on your card appears on the screen, cover the square with an M&M, a penny, or just draw an X on the square.
6. The first player who marks 5 squares in a row must shout, Super Bowl Bingo! The first person to call it wins. Or, if you want to go all out, the first player who marks the entire board wins.

Enjoy!

Wes Welker: Does He Have a Girlfriend?

13 Jan

UPDATE: Wes is now engaged to the woman seen below, Anna Burns.

Let it not be said that I never do anything for you.

Because I have real-live pictures (taken of my TV with my cell phone) of the woman who may be Wes Welker‘s girlfriend. If he has a girlfriend. (My apologies, Wes, if she’s a relative.)

Girlfriend and Wes, who is high-fiving Pats owner Robert Kraft. (Also my DVR. Love you, DVR!)

And the GF giving Kraft (or another owner-type) a half-assed high five. I'm going to give her the benefit of the doubt and say that she is just uncomfortable here and not the eye-rolling type.

Aren’t we glad the Patriots scored those two touchdowns so we could at least see into the owner’s box seats?

Weekly Wrap-Up

2 Dec

Hey, look at me! I’m writing a weekly wrap-up! During the week!

I know, I know, I’m an amazing blogger.

Anyhoo, let’s wrap-up.

Football-related:

  • Full disclosure first: This is a really difficult season for me to care about. Why? Because my team (the Bucs) are 1-10. Last year this time I knew every team in the league’s records. I knew who was in position for a wild card playoff slot. I knew all of the top players and who was struggling and all that jazz. This year I’m like, uh, now are the Steelers like 7-4? Or 4-7? Or maybe they decided to sit out this year? Dunno. So anyway,  football depresses me. A lot. So I haven’t been writing as much.
  • That said, holy cowza did the Saints win on Monday! I did not see that coming. I mean, a win sure. But a trouncing of the Pats? Who knew. It seems like the Saints are set for a straight shot to the Super Bowl, but I guess the Vikings will probably have something to say about that. I still think that a NFC Championship with Saints vs. Vikings, followed by the winner playing the Colts will be the most awesomely awesome end-of-postseason possible. (Because the Bucs can’t make it, obvi.) Can you imagine Brees and the city of New Orleans vs. Brett Favre? And either one of them vs. Peyton Manning?!?!
    If the Super Bowl turns out to be the Cardinals vs. the Chargers I am seriously canceling my NFL fandom.
  • I watched the MNF game on my computer. It was live-streaming from Australia. Fun fact: In Australia, Burger King is called Hungry Jack’s. And instead of saying the burger is topped with “lettuce,” they say it is topped with “salad.” Fascinating.
  • Who loves the new Peyton Manning commercial? I do! I know I’m supposed to have jaded feelings about him and say how he’s so overexposed, and I’m so over him. But I can’t.  I’m sorry. I love everything he does.
    (“It’s a football.” “Who told you?!” Priceless.)

Non-football:

  • Happy birthday to Friend Cupcake, on whose behalf I made delicious chocolate chip cookies last night because I am just that thoughtful. However, I just ate one of said cookies, and it cut the top of my mouth. A leetle crunchy, those. Sorry, Friend Cupcake.
  • So You Think You Can Dance:
    1) The final 3 had better be Jakob, Ellenore, and Russell.

    2) Yay for a dance that I loved finally! Care of Ellenore and Jakob, whom I hope will “coincidentally” pick each other as partners every week, like Katee and Josh did. The dance is Sonya Tayeh, and it’s weird awesome and amazing (just like Ellenore and Jakob, respectively).

    3) Why would anyone give their kid a name that ends in a double-e? It basically ensures that your kid will be a perpetual toddler. Case in point: Mollee.

    4) Who else applauds every time Anya or Pasha shows up in the audience? And who else started shrieking when they saw (an uncredited) Katee helping one of the choreographers a few weeks ago? Everyone did? I thought so!

    5) New idea: Every time the judges give a critique, show the choreographer’s reaction. Especially when the choreographer is Spencer, the new Broadway guy.

    6) Newer idea: Every time the judges give a critique of any dance, show Spencer, the new Broadway guy.

    Newest Idea: After every dance, show Spencer in a bikini!

FifG Game of the Week: New Orleans Saints vs. New England Patriots

30 Nov

New Orleans Saints [10-0] vs. New England Patriotst [7-3] (Monday 8:30 p.m., ESPN)

Why it’s good football: This is easily the game of the week. A potential Super Bowl match-up. Two high-scoring offenses. Great coaching. Top QBs in Drew Brees (NO) and Tom Brady (NE). It’s going to be a shoot out, and it’s going to be fun!

Why you might care: I know you have an opinion on Tom Brady. So if you are all about the hot dude who’s expecting a baby with his supermodel wife, this is your chance to cheer on the Pats. And if you think Brady is an overrated pansy, or have issues with the fact that he dumped his pregnant girlfriend and then started dating a supermodel, who claimed to mother his ex-girlfriend’s baby, well, then it’s your big chance to root against the Pats.

Love? Hate?

Football is just like Pop Culture!

If this game is Tough Love on VH1, then the Patriots are Taylor, who had success in previous seasons and was down at first this season but is making a big comeback and is a real contender for winning the heart of a man at the end of the season. (Which would be the Super Bowl in this semi-metaphor.)

Of course, that’s if she can get past Rocky, the fierce “rocker” with a heart of gold. Or maybe silicon. And probably it’s not her heart, actually. So Rocky would be the Saints. Playing hard. Rocking out. Ready to face off with Taylor in her quest to find a good man.

Um, ok, so once again this connection totally sucks, BUT who else loves Tough Love? Best. Show. On. Television. Seriously, what is it about this show that sucks me in every time? Who is everyone’s favorite? I think I like the reeeeeeally old and washed up bartender (who’s 31). Or maybe the stripper who doesn’t pay attention to her dates.

I really don’t like the fat-girl-gone-thin. It’s like, boo hoo, I have no self-esteem. Boo hoo, keep telling me how beautiful I am so I can feel better about myself. Need-y. (Ok, that’s mean, but I firmly believe that low self-image is best kept to oneself and sometimes close friends and family, but NOT the viewing public. Because then it comes across as fishing.)

And, also, has anyone else noticed that the adorable blonde Southern belles always ends up in a serious relationship within 2 days of arriving at the house? How does that happen? I mean, do they really need this show? I think  not.

Steve is all about Tough Love. But not modeling. Oofta.

Steve is all about Tough Love. And sculpted eyebrows.

Oh, and what does everyone think about the host being all like, hey, don’t hurt guys’ feelings because they won’t like you anymore. But don’t give them a hard time if they hurt yours, because it happens. 

Ok, that is all.

Boyfriend/Husband/Dad/Other will be so impressed!

Conversation Starters:

-Who do you like for MVP this year? Drew Brees? (Brees has a 105.8 QB rating in 2009, 22 touchdowns, and only 9 interceptions.)
-What was up with that 4th down play Belichick called against the Colts 2 weeks ago? Is he getting senile, or is the defense really that untrustworthy?

Fun Facts:

-The Saints are now 10-0, and only 6 games away from a perfect 16-0 season. The only team to ever accomplish that feat? The New England Patriots, of course. (The 2007 Patriots won all but 1 game that season/post-season: the Super Bowl. Oops.)
-This week’s NE Cute Football Player of the Week, Wes Welker, had a career game against the Jets last week, catching 15 passes for 192 yards. Opposing defenses have to find ways to cover both Welker and Randy Moss.

Player Pronunciation:

Junior Seau (NE): joon-yer say-ow
Jabari Greer (NO): juh-bah-ree greer

Cute football player(s) of the week:

Wes Welker, New England Patriots

 

Ha.

Darren Sharper, New Orleans Saints

 

With Melanie Fiona. Whoever that is.

FifG Game of the Week: Bucs vs. Patriots

22 Oct

Tampa Bay Bucs [0-6] vs. New England Patriots [4-2] (Sunday 1:00 p.m., CBS)

Ok, so it’s not really the Game of the Week. In fact, it will likely be a terrible game. But! The game is in London! And FifG is heading to Paris tonight! So it’s proximity to me qualifies it for the honor.

Want to learn more about the awfulness that will be going down in this game? Read my Chicks in the Huddle post here.

Want a souvenir from Europe? Tell me in the comments section. (None of my friends want souvenirs, which I get since souvenirs tend to be kind of lame, but I am so happy to be traveling to a souvenir-friendly place that I will probably end up forcing some Eiffel Tower figurine or bronzed Belgian waffle on all of them. Be forewarned, friends.)

Cute Football Player of the Week: Kevin O’Connell

29 Aug

UPDATE 9/6: Oooooooookay. Now he’s a Jet.

UPDATE 9/2: Kevin’s a Lion now. Um, maybe not the most auspicious move for him?

UPDATE 8/30: Yes, Kevin O’Connell is totally cut. But also? Totally cut. FifG wishes you luck finding a new job, Kevin.

First of all, I have to say that I’m a little disappointed that Friend Kevin did not clue me in to this one, seeing as he’s a huge Patriots fan.

Second of all, what the heck is up with Patriots QBs? I’m watching the Redskins v. Pats preseason game (yes, it’s Friday and I need a life. But it’s rainy! Lives don’t happen when it’s rainy.)

Anyway, the announcer folk were describing a shot of the Pats’ sidelines and one was like, “There are the QBs.”
And I was like, yeah, there’s ol’ chiseled Tom Brady.

But no! It was backup QB Kevin O’Connell. Who looks, from afar and without my brand-new slightly nearsighted person glasses, a lot like Tom Brady. The Patriots are known to have an inordinate amount of talent on their team, but geez, they have an inordinate amount of talent on their team!

Here’s proof:

Brady in foreground, OConnell in background.

Brady in foreground, O'Connell in background.

Another Patriot (also cute, but no clue who he is--sorry!) and Oconnell. Oh yeah, and there is a child standing between them. He is likely not in the NFL.

Also cute player who I think is DeSean Jackson based on the uniform in the picture, San Diego Charger player Li'l Child, and O'Connell.

Kevin O’Connell, we hardly know ye:

Apparently backup QBs who are not married to their pregnant supermodel wives do not have as much personal information shared on the interwebs.
That said, I can tell you that O’Connell went to San Diego State and majored in political science.
According to this rookie year (that would be last year) article, he’s very charismatic. So perhaps he’ll run for office once he’s done with the ol’ pigskin.
Also, he and some other teammate/random person are not well-endowed. Here’s proof.

Does he have a girlfriend?

Another one that I just do not know. But if he’s planning a career in politics, he’s probably open to meeting new ladies whether or not he’s in a relationship! Good news!

A Very Brady Wedding

27 Feb

Hey! It’s a girl-centric football post! And in the off-season no less. Fab.

So it seems that Patriots’ QB Tom Brady and model Giselle Bundchen really were engaged, because guess what? They’re married now!

You know what they say. The couple who eats ice cream together gets fat together. Except for Tom and Gisele, because theyre all perfect and stuff.

You know what they say. The couple who eats ice cream together gets fat together. Except for Tom and Gisele, because they're all perfect and stuff.

Congrats to the happy couple, and let’s hope the Power of Love helps heal Tom’s knee.

Take it away, Huey Lewis and the News and your rockin’ mullets :

FifG Games of the Week

27 Dec

Ok, it’s the last week of regular season, and so it’s virtually impossible to choose a single game this time. So here are a few important games with limited pop culture analogizing, because I’m suffering from post-holiday sugar overload, and it’s had the unfortunate effect of rendering my brain uncreative.

Miami Dolphins (10-5)  vs. New York Jets (9-6) [Sunday 4:15 p.m., CBS]

Why it’s good football: It’s Brett Favre vs. the man that was kicked out in favor of Brett Favre (i.e. husband material Chad Pennington) for the chance to win the AFC East and head to the playoffs. If the Jets lose the game, coach Eric Mangini might lose his job, and Brett Favre might retire after a non-playoff season. Which would make unretiring seem pretty dumb.

Chad looks manly in teal.

Chad looks manly in teal.

Denver Broncos (8-7) vs. San Diego Chargers (7-8) [Sunday 8:15, NBC]

Husband/boyfriend/father will be so impressed: Well, watch this one to potentially find out which team with single-digit wins makes it to the playoffs over a Patriots team with 11 wins. (That is, if the Patriots both win and miss the playoffs, which is a real possibility.) Then, if they decide to change playoff rules in the offseason to not allow any team to enter the playoffs with fewer than 10 wins, even if they win whatever crappy division to which they belong, and you are watching a football game in a bar or amongst many manly friends in years to come, you can say, “Oh yeah, remember back in ’08 when the Broncos/Chargers made the playoffs over the Patriots? That’s totally when the rules changed. It was in-sane.” And you will WOW everyone in the room.

Put money in thy purse.

(Can we call that the pop culture reference for the day? It’s from Othello. We watched the BBC version in high school, and Bob Hoskins played Iago, and I loved how he said that line like a zillion times because his accent is kind of silly. Also, Anthony Hopkins played Othello, which probably wouldn’t happen nowadays. This is Kenneth Branagh as Iago, because I can’t find Bob’s version online.)

Oh yeah, speaking of the Pats, Tom and Gisele are engaged. Remember him?

Oh yeah, speaking of the Pats, Tom and Gisele are engaged. Remember him?

Dallas Cowboys (9-6)  vs. Philadelphia Eagles (8-6-1) [Sunday 4:15 p.m., FOX]

Guess what? Now T.O. thinks his fellow wide receiver Roy Williams is also not getting the ball enough. So much for one big happy family. I don’t even think I have a comparable Shannen Doherty reference to this one, except that maybe Shannen used to pull Tori Spelling into her web of craziness when Tori was young, because she didn’t know any better. But Roy Williams is a grown man, so that doesn’t really work.

Unfortunately, the Eagles may not have a reason to play to win at 4:15 as they may, at that point, be mathematically eliminated from the playoffs. So the Game of the Week-ness of this one is based more on the 1:00 Bucs vs. Raiders game (Bucs win, this game will likely be a snoozefest). BUT if T.O. and friends unleash the crazy, who knows. Come for the football, stay for the crazy!

If Roy tires of the crazy Cowboys, he can do Crest commercials.

If Roy tires of the crazy Cowboys, he can do Crest commercials.

Detroit Lions (0-15)  vs. Green Bay Packers (5-10) [Sunday 1:00 p.m., FOX]

Fun Fact: The Detroit Lions could become the first team in NFL history to go 0-16! The 1976 expansion Tampa Bay Bucs are the only other team to be completely defeatedful/prodefeated/unfeated, but there were only 14 games in a season at the time, so the Lions have the chance to step things up a bit. Or down, actually. Poor Detroit. Here’s a nice article on how the team is sort of mirroring the city in misery.

Cute Player:

Calvin Johnson, Detroit Lions, Wide Receiver

Look, hes cute AND hes a good player!

Look, he's cute AND he's a good player!

AND he has nice arm muscles. Go Lions!

AND he has nice arm muscles. Go Lions!

FifG Game of the Week: New England Patriots vs. San Diego Chargers

11 Oct

New England Patriots [3-1] vs. San Diego Chargers [2-3] (Sunday 8:15 p.m., NBC)

Why it’s good football: Well, this year it’s not the best football ever, honestly, but last year? Whew, this would have been a great matchup! So maybe the best thing about this game is watching to see which team that was supposed to be good this year is better than the other.

Why are they not so hot this year? Tom Brady was knocked out of the season with a knee injury in the first game of the year, and the Patriots season came tumbling after. (Though it seems Tom may be tying the knot with Gisele any day now, so his year doesn’t seem to be as bad as his team’s thus far.) As for the Chargers, well, they’ve had a lot of bad luck with officiating thus far, and Ladanian Tomlinson, their star running back, has been off to a slow start.

Why you might care:

Lots of teams have been wearing throwback jerseys this year, so maybe the Chargers will, too. And, I’m sorry, but these are just the prettiest football uniforms ever.

Dont get your dirty handprint on my uniform.

Don't get your dirty handprint on my uniform.

Football is just like Pop Culture!

It’s not exactly a girly tv show, but it was a movie, and a book, and it’s one of my favorite analogies.

Randy Moss is totally Seabiscuit! Seabiscuit was the award-winning racehorse in the 1930s-40s. The book is by Laura Hillenbrand. I loved. The movie starred Tobey Maguire. I only watched the first five minutes. Not because it was a bad movie necessarily (because I don’t know if it was–I didn’t watch it), but because my favorite parts of the book that were the ones that dealt with the psychology of the horse himself. The movie couldn’t possibly have done anything similar unless there was some Beverly Hills Chihuahua/Mr. Ed-type action happening. So anyway, let me tell you about Seabiscuit. He was an extremely talented racer, very fast and very much aware of his own skill. (Yes, it’s true. It’s in the book!) Apparently he also liked messing with the heads of the other horses and would run at a slow pace so that the other horses thought they were going to win, and then he’d pull ahead in the last couple of steps and break their hearts. According to the book, several horses had to stop racing altogether because their hearts were broken after dealing with Seabiscuit’s antics. Of course, in general if the competition was not at a level that Seabiscuit deemed adequate, he just wouldn’t try at all, and he’d lose races he should have won because he just didn’t feel like the races were worth his energy.

Randy Moss is the same sort of athlete! He’s considered one of the most talented wide receivers in the league today, and some say in the history of football. (If you keep statements like this really vague, that makes them more true. Fact.) He’s tall, and he can jump, and he’s fast, and when he’s playing at his best, it’s a thing of athletic beauty. However, when he doesn’t feel his team’s level of play is high enough, he checks out. Randy was drafted by the Minnesota Vikings and played well for them for a while, but he had conflicts with his co-receiver Cris Carter and ended up heading to Oakland. In Oakland he was miserable and so played miserably. What does that mean? Well, receivers have set routes that they are supposed to run each play, depending on what the coach/QB calls. On his worst days, Randy wouldn’t run the routes. He’d stop or he’d jog. If the ball was thrown over his head, he’d just watch it go instead of making the kind of leaping catches he was clearly able to make. Plus he was grumpy with the press and likely grumpy with other players. Not good.

Now, last year, Randy was traded to the New England Patriots. Many assumed that Randy would be the same lazy, cranky player that he’d become everywhere else he went. But the Patriots were exceptionally good, and Tom Brady was the QB of his dreams, and so Randy thrived. Brady threw him the ball often, and Randy scored scads and scads of touchdowns. And they won every single regular season game together. And then they won all of their playoff games. And then they lost the Super Bowl. Oops. But then 2008 was the year! Super Bowl! Huge numbers! And then Brady was hurt in the first game. Double Oops.

Question now, how will Randy react to playing with a new, non-Brady QB? They’ve already lost to the Miami Dolphins this year, so what happens if they keep losing? Does Randy Moss turn into the same old slacker, or is his winning spirit going to carry over from last year? My bet? Well, I’ll just say that Seabiscuit would probably just trot it out.

Boyfriend/Husband/Dad/Other will be so impressed!

Conversation Starters:

- The Chargers are giving up 25.8 points a game this year. What happened to their defense?

-Do you have LT (Ladanian Tomlinson) on your fantasy team this year? Killing you so far, right? At least you didn’t pick a Brady and Moss tandem! Hahaha.

Fun Fact:

-The Patriots’ first four games of 2008 were played against teams whose 2007 records were a combined 14-50. They’ve lost one game so far (to the Dolphins who were 1-15 last year). The Chargers’ first five games of 2008 were played against opponents whose 2007 records were a combined 23-57. They’ve lost three of these games. New England has already had a bye week this year, which accounts for having played only four games thus far.

Player Pronunciation:

Matt Cassel (NE): mat ka-suhl

Nate Kaeding (SD): nāt kā-ding

Cute football player(s) of the week:

Wes Welker, New England Patriots wide receiver

Wes Welker is a stallion. (Im not an expert on horse puns.)

Wes Welker is a stallion. (Or just insert some other, more clever horse pun here.)

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