Cute (International) Football Players of the Week: US World Cup Team

Yes, FifG is hopelessly devoted to American football. But I’ll be honest, I’ve caught a bit of World Cup fever over the past week or so.

I don’t know about you, but I spent 93 work-minutes this morning listening to one of the most exciting, nearly-scoreless games ever. (The score was 0-0 for 92-ish minutes, and I was still on the edge of my seat. I know, I know–très un-American of me.)

Of course, when you listen to games, you have no idea what these players actually look like. So let me help you all out here: They look beyooooootiful.

But don’t take my word for it.

Carlos Bocanegra

Maurice Edu

Oguchi Onyewu

Carlos Bocanegra again. (How'd that happen?)

Dear FifG: Fantasy Football Team Names

Today our question comes from the comments.
Here’s what Heidi had to say:

I need help…it’s my first time in a fantasy football league and I need a super-cool team name. I might use your brady quinn pic for my avatar. any ideas???

Heidi, welcome to the world of fantasy football! I think you’ll love it.

As for team names, there are a few different ways to go:

• Base your team name on your favorite NFL Team. If there is an NFL team that you are passionate about, you can name your fantasy team after them. For instance, I named my team in my secondary league this year Buc’n Great! That’s because I’m a Bucs fan. Friend Kevin‘s team this year is called the Shirtless Pats, because he follows the Patriots. And likes them to not wear shirts. If you happen to follow the Browns, you can go with something like Cleveland Rocks! (exclamation points are totally allowed) or Browns Sugar. 
  

  Wait, FifG Cute Football Player Kevin O'Connell didn't get the shirtless memo...

• Base your team name on your favorite player. Another member of my league has named his team Johnny Ballgame, after John Elway. He is a Broncos fan in general, and an Elway fan in particular. Because really, is he going to name his team after Kyle Orton? Probably not. Since it seems you are a Brady Quinn gal, you can try something like Brady Bunch or Quinntessential Baller or Mrs. Quinn’s Team.
  UPDATE: Or, duh, The Mighty Quinn. 
•  
  

  Maybe the Shirtless Quinns?

   

• Make yourself laugh. I like to choose names that I think are incredibly funny. Please note that if you choose this naming convention, you shouldn’t expect people to read your team name and congratulate you on your superior wit. Because probably they won’t think you’re as funny as you think you are. (I learned this lesson many times over.) Last year I named my team Chiklis because I’m the commissioner of my fantasy league, and Michael Chicklis starred in the show “The Commish.” No one got this joke. No one. And yet, each time I think of this name, I laugh a little. And, yes, I do congratulate myself on my superior wit.
  And isn’t that what really counts? 

   

  

  At least he gets my joke.

• Show your love of the game. Lots of people choose something in the more vanilla rah-rah football category, like TD Champion! or Fantasy Phenom or Kings of Pigskin. Personally, I find these a little dull, but it’s always good to show a winning sense of confidence.

• Make a dirty joke. These are popular (particularly with men, I think), and so examples are way easy to find on google. I did a quick search, and here’s a tame but pretty funny example: Breaston Plants, in honor of Steve Breaston of the AZ Cardinals.

Good luck on your first fantasy season, and happy playing!
Let FifG know how it goes!